Sunday, July 12, 2015

Cowo tu maunya apa sih? Cewe tu knapa gini sih?

Kalian pernah ga sih ditanyain sama temen-temen kalian soal cowo yang (nampaknya) lagi PDKT ke temen lo?
"Eh gue kayaknya lagi dideketin sama si A deh, tp dia tarik ulur gue.. gue gimana dong?"
Atau untuk cowo,
"umm, ni cewe kok tiap gue senderin tangan gue di pundaknya mukanya langsung nyengir gede ya? padahal kan gue pegel doang"

Gue emang bisa dibilang kurang pengalaman soal dunia per-PDKT-an dan percintaan. Secara pacaran aja baru 2x itupun telat mulainya. Maklum pas masa-masa jahiliyah dulu muka ga jelas banget bentuknya, well, sampe sekarang juga sih.. Tapi gue banyak mendengar cerita dari temen-temen gue yang punya banyak masalah ketika mereka lagi deket sama cewe atau cowo. Eits, tenang, gue ga akan nulis cuma masalah cewe aja kok, tapi masalah cowo juga :D

Ketika temen-temen cewe gue curhat sama gue, kata-kata mereka selalu diawali dengan,
"Ih sebel deh! tu cowo maunya apa sih?" 
"Dia suka sama gue ga sih sebenernya?"
"Ghin, dia itu kayaknya suka nih sama gue, tapi dia ga bilang2 dan gue bingung harus gimana?!" bla bla bla. Trust me, banyak banget pertanyaan2 yang dilontarkan. phhfff..
Trus gue tanya ke mereka "kenapa lo ga tanya aja sama tu cowo apakah dia suka sama lo apa ga?" temen gue sambil muncrat ngomongnya bilang, "YA KALI GUE TANYA, GHIN! MAU DIBAWA KEMANA MUKA GUE?!"

Muke lo ya di situ-situ aja...

Nah,

Gue bingung. Kebanyakan cewe itu maunya apa sih? Mnurut gue ya kita ga bisa expect makhluk hidup, terutama yang memiliki hormon testosteron, untuk jadi mind reader. Seenak jidat lo aja gitu?

Sama aja kayak lo lagi dideketin sama cowo, tapi lo ga kasih perasaan yang sama. Lo harus ngapain? bingung kan? Di satu sisi lo gaenak untuk nolak. Jadi lo end up dengan mengirimkan sinyal-sinyal yang salah. Yang ada tu cowo malah makin gencar deketin lo dan lo malah rewel sendiri ujungnya. 

Duh, kita jadi cewe juga harus firm dong.. Kalo ga suka ya bilang ga suka, kalo suka ya lanjoot. Jangan nyiksa cowo gitu-gitu amat juga lah. Kalo lo ga bilang terus terang kalo lo ga suka, ya bilang ga suka.. Jangan malah nolak-nolak-mau.. Kan cowo juga jadi bingung.

Beda lagi sama temen-temen gue yang cowo. Nah, sebenernya cowo itu simple dan realistis menurut gue. cuman kadang juga mereka saking simpelnya, melakukan hal-hal yang menimbulkan sinyal yang salah ke mata cewe. Gue emang lagi ngomongin hal spesifik tentang ketika cowo lagi PDKT ke cewe. Menurut temen-temen gue yang cowo, kalo cowo lagi suka sama cewe, mereka akan lebih aktif dan gencar untuk PDKT. Ya iyalah namanya juga PDKT. Obvious enough, doh! Kalo cewenya ga suka ya tinggal cari lagi (walaupun ada juga cowo yang tetep semangat 45 untuk dapetin cewe itu). NAH, tapi kalo situasinya itu kebalikannya, akan lebih complicated lagi jadinya. 

Contoh, ketika si cewe naksir sama si cowo, trus si cewe mungkin akan mencoba untuk menarik perhatian si cowo kan? (emansipasi mas bro!) Gayanya jadi makin cantik, ngobrol disambung-sambungin, dll. Nanya,
"km udah makan belum?"
"Kamu lagi apa?"
"Eh, aku tadi abis nonton Game of Thrones loh, seru deh!"
Bahkan dalam beberapa case yang cukup extreme, si cewe akan bilang,
"Umm, aku kangen..."
 #eaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

atau dalam bahasa Danish, ææææææææææææ
(maaf garing)

But anyway, si cowo nerima sms kayak gitu ya pasti mungkin gaakan banyak mikir dan bales aja gitu kan.. Nah! si cewe nerima balesan si cowo langsung kegirangan dong! Langsung mikir kalo ada secercah harapan untuk dapetin hati si cowo, trus berasumsi mungkin si cowo itu juga suka sama dia tapi si cowo ga bilang aja.. bla bla bla bla...

Si cowo di rumah ----------> tetep lanjut main game tanpa mikir apa-apa.

Ini loh yang gue bilang kesenjangan perasaan. Tanpa dipungkiri lagi, cewe itu probabilitas signifikansi ke-baper-an nya itu kalo diuji di SPSS adalah 0.000. Sangat signifikan. Segampang itu loh bok! Bahkan cewe abnormal kayak gue yang bisa dibilang kurang sensitif ketika di PDKT-in aja ada kemungkinan kok baper. It's normal!

Belum lagi banyak juga cowo yang sangat friendly dalam memberikan physical touch. Eits, jangan jorok dulu! Maksutnya di sini adalah sebatas hugs, rangkul temen, dll. For some guys, normal kok untuk memperlakukan cewe dengan kasih sayang walaupun ga ada perasaan apa-apa. Ya, cuma untuk sebatas comfort aja sebagai temen deket. 

TAPI, 

Barang siapa yang memperlakukan cewe dengan physical touch yang melambangkan kasih sayang, niscaya cewe tersebut akan baper!

Seriusan deh! Don't do that guys if you don't have any feeling to that girl!

Kecuali kalo lo emang pengen prospekin cewe itu untuk menjadi dekat... lebih dekat... lebih dalam...  dan lebih dalam lagi..... sama lo. Then that is the right thing to do. Let her know you like her. Make a move :)

Tapi kalo lo emang gaada niatan jadiin tu cewe jadi cewe lo, jangan sekali-sekali melakukan hal tersebut! Haram (menurut kamus gue) hukumnya. Tu cewe pasti akan bingung dan baper! Apalagi kebanyakan cewe, no offense girls, suka galau. Mungkin yang tadinya ga suka sama lo, gara-gara lo perlakukan kayak gitu ya jadi suka juga karena lo udah bikin dia comfort. Sekali lagi, itu BAHAYA!

Tapi apa yang gue omongin di atas tidak menggambarkan semua cowo dan cewe ya.. i mean, ada juga cowo dan cewe yang menganggap hal itu biasa aja. Ya contohnya gue, kalo emang gaada perasaan ya sebenernya gaada masalah untuk memperlakukan temen lo sesuai yang lo mau, tapi sekali lagi, belum tentu orang yang lo gituin akan berpikir hal yang sama, bukan?

Nah untuk para cewe, seriously, jangan terlalu mengharapkan cowo itu sebagai mind reader deh.. Kasian tau mereka itu.. Kalian ga ngebayangin apa muka mereka yang terlihat dalam dan menawan ketika menatap lo tapi sebenernya mereka lagi mikirin game apa yang harus dimainin abis ini? Sedangkan di satu sisi kalian sibuk mengirimkan telepati sinyal-sinyal ke mereka tentang apa yang harusnya mereka lakukan ke kalian? Jangan kasih mereka beban yang lebih berat lagi untuk baca pikiran kalian karena pikiran mereka sudah dipenuhi dengan scene-scene Game of Thrones episode minggu lalu.. Belum lagi tadi mereka lupa membubuhi banyak pomade di rambut mereka jadi jambulnya agak turun.

Be realistic, girls! 

Jangan berasumsi tentang apa yang ada di pikiran cowo-cowo itu. Dan juga jangan terlalu berekspektasi yang terlalu besar karena menurut gue pribadi, expectations hurts you. Kalo mereka ga sms kalian duluan, ya mungkin mereka sibuk.. Jangan posesif.. Apalagi belum pacaran tapi kok udah posesif.. Come on..

Kalo mereka emang sama sekali pasif ketika ngobrol sama kalian atau bales sms lo lama, mungkin mereka emang ga tertarik sama lo dan emang cuma pengen jadi temen aja.. Bahkan ada menurut pengakuan temen gue yang cowo (dan ga cuma satu loh ini!) yang bilang kalo mereka emang sengaja ngebales sms dari cewe itu terakhir setelah cek-cek email, ngelakuin ini itu, karena simply mereka emang ga tertarik sama tu cewe. Ughhh burn!! Lumayan annoying loh untuk mereka para cowo ketika lo suka sms-sms terlalu sering.. Kalo udah kayak gitu, mending lupain aja.. kecuali lo emang punya semangat pejuang yang pantang mundur...

Nah, untuk segelintir cewe yang abnormal seperti gue, yang kurang sensitif, cuek, dan suka ga nyadar  kalo lagi dideketin, hmmm.. gue juga bingung sih mesti gimana. mungkin dari cowo-cowo yang baca ini ada saran untuk cewe-cewe kayak gue? karena jujur kita ga bisa bedain cowo PDKT sama temen :p Kita sih gampang aja, kalo kita suka ya lanjut, kalo ga suka udah pasti nolak dari awal. 

But, Sometimes it's good to be us, karena kita jadi jarang punya ekspektasi tentang cowo. Like i said, expectation hurts! Tapi kasian juga sih untuk cowo-cowo yang mau ngedeketin lo karena jadi harus usaha ekstra keras untuk bikin lo sadar kalo dia suka sama lo, dan ujung-ujungnya give up karena bingung harus gimana lagi. Cowo pasti bingung sama lo yg ga sadar-sadar kalo lo lagi dideketin, tp ya mungkin mereka memang harus usaha ekstra aja dan mungkin harus lebih honest kali ya.. We, girls, cannot also be your mind readers, guys! So tell her that you like her! If you are lucky, then you will go into her heart. Kalo ga ya, sabar-sabar aje... Be direct and honest!

Life is as simple as it is. Capek dibikin ribet.

Monday, December 22, 2014

Round up the year

I finally managed to write something now after series of great times with great people. 2014 has been great for me especially with life. It was funny cause i remember at the beginning of January i was reading on some yearly horoscope (i know, very typical of me), and it says that i will have a great travel year, everything will change to betterment, and it's all about travelling. And i was like, sure, i'm going to Singapore right after i finished my Bachelor's thesis. But that was the start.

So i finally graduated on January, where i defended my final bachelor's thesis to three most powerful lecturer in the university, Pak Tony (Dean), Pak Deddy (Head of Rector), and Pak Urip (specialist of HR and employment). I was nervous, shaking, and so scared that i won't get my grade good enough, but it ended up happily ever after, I got A for my thesis and that means my GPA for that semester is 4 out of 4 which could not get any better, really. I'm so proud of myself and thankful of beloved people that helped me through. And then it went to February where, well, i didn't have anything, really, except for enjoyment and fresh air, and on March, i went on holiday to Singapore with my half :). It was great experience and first time for me to have holiday outside of the country in such a long time, and i felt like i really needed it. April was okay for me except that i have 4 years-anniversary with Panka, which was a record for both of us and we're proud of it :). Great and shocking news came on May where i got accepted for scholarship from Aarhus University in Denmark! yes DENMARK which is so cool. It was such a huge news for me since going to Europe was my dream, plus i also got accepted in Birmingham University, but i had to choose Aarhus with big consideration. Months after that were pretty fast for me and it was time for me to leave Indonesia on August where it was a big sad moment. I had to leave everyone that i love for two years and really, it was really hard. But i have faith that everything is gonna be alright. I finally got to start my semester in September, and i was nervous and clueless! But everything went great, i got many nice friends, i spent my time (and money) for fun things, and really, it couldn't get any better. I went to Hamburg, Germany on November for a project+holiday (hehe..) with my international friends and it was more than awesome! I still cannot believe that i have my foot on Europe right now! Awesome! Now, it is pretty cold on December, the winter is coming, the wind is even crazier, oh, i just hate the weather. But hey, i think i can survived! i got my winter boots and jacket from Panka, which i am so thankful about it, and i got friends to hang out and party with, it is just cannot get any better!


And it will come more excitement next year! 



Sunday, September 7, 2014

The Happiest Nation In The World



So it has been two weeks since the first time i came to Denmark. In the beginning, i was terrified. Yes, sounds childish and fragile, but that's just how i felt. I was afraid that i won't get any friend in the campus, I was afraid i won't understand why the teachers say in the class, afraid from getting lost, afraid of everything. But, hey you know what, this is my third day in the class, and everything went great! Love it so far! people were so nice, pretty open i can say, at least now. Well i hope this will continue til the end!

As some of you might know, Denmark is the happiest nation on earth. People smile and everything. But there are some things that we have to know about this nation. Well, at least from my perspective:

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Between Selfies and tongsis?

As i promised on previous post, here are some pictures of us. FYI, tongsis is involved :)

       -Copenhagen


Reaching our dreams




           - Our Aarhus town and University :)






Welcome to Denmark!


Hi Everyone!

So it's been sometimes since i haven't wrote anything in this blog due to several circumstances in my life (too formal, i know). But seriously, there are things going on in my life right now, maybe i've mentioned it before in previous posts (or maybe not). 

But anyway, i have been accepted to one of top 100 universities in the world, and top 50 in Europe, Aarhus University (QS World University Ranking). I, myself, with 2 other students from Universitas Bakrie got accepted in this University. Probably some of you are asking how could someone from, well, a pretty much young campus in Indonesia, got accepted in this big University, not to mention, with a full scholarship? YES, full scholarship. One word, AWESOME. 

This all started when you have intention. Intention to find yourself to have a brighter future. How so? I know, when most of you graduated from college or your Bachelor degree, you'll find yourself some, well, enjoyment, the feeling of relieves. But don't get stuck too long with that feeling, cause you still have to find a job, doing many other things, etc. At this stage, i found myself also stuck for a couple of months, working in a great place called @america (awesome place to work), until i realise, i have to aim something higher in my life, out of my comfort zone. Yes, seeing the world. I know, some of you might think it's suppose to be education. But i'd say, see the whole world is the highest aim, one of the way is through education. Lucky me, Alhamdulillah, praise to Allah SWT, i got both things at the same time, going to Europe while getting my MSc. 

So, I graduated on January 2014 from Bakrie University with very satisfying result, i must say for a lazy person as myself, with my full scholarship program granted by Bakrie Enterprises. On March i got a call from my mentor telling me that there is full scholarship program offered by a University in Denmark. And i said, sure! i'll try it. So i asked my best friend Amandari, who's also from Bakrie University, to try it. Right away, we collected every document we need for the application, big credit goes to Pak Tony (our Dean and my thesis supervisor in Bakrie Univ.) and Pak Deddy (our head of program at a time) for helping us. We made an account and submit our applications together, while at the same time we were also applying for universities in UK with LPDP scholarship program. Then two months later, on May, we got acceptance letter from Aarhus University plus the scholarship offer from the university. Also Kak Alfan, who i knew very well from Debate club in Bakrie University, also got in! Wow! We were so happy and confuse at the same time. We were thinking, "What? Denmark? Are we going to Denmark?". At same time, we also got acceptance letter from Birmingham University in UK. We didn't know what to do. It was like a dream for us. What do we have to do??

Thursday, July 17, 2014

Love is a weirdo

Yes. if i could metaphor love to a person, i could see it as a weirdo. That beautiful yet ugly face that you hate to see, but miss a lot when you don't have them. That strong but yet have a deep weakness, when it comes to a situation (of course). That easy to get but yet difficult to be understood.

Oh such a weirdo.



I've been through a lot hell of phases in my life involving this 'weirdo'. It causes so much trouble, but yet, can't leave it. 

Lots of people want it as pet, but many of them want it to be part of their lives. It comes and go in a beautiful and painful way at the same time. Oh such a weirdo...

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Do we really know everything?


It is so weird on how people made headlines about everything nowadays. I guess people are just too interested on something, huh?

Starting from this year Presidential Vote, which made a huge different, i mean really, HUGE. It has impacts including to myself who was always been to lazy to move my ass to vote, literally. But this year, something has moved me, beat my laziness, and even created some kind of eagerness to sort of like involve in a campaign of one of the candidate. Which unusually, for this year, we have only two candidates to win the presidential election. 

This year was so different, so it kinda make me feel strange in my own country. There are so many people who are usually lazy and just simply don't give a shit about governmental issue, like me, eventually care about who wins the election. Wow. This amazed me. They even begged, and some were posting some crazy shit about another candidate in hope could change other people mind on deciding who to vote. So weird. Every time i logged on to Facebook, which i barely do that in the last couple year, the timeline was full of crazy news. i mean really crazy shit. Lots of people were trying to black mailing other candidate, even though I'm pretty sure the candidate itself don't know about them. haha!  I know, people just know everything, and just assume that they were all correct. Thats the power of media! which sometimes i hate.

But people are seemed to know everything. Ok. So after all some crazy stuff about presidential elections, here it comes the Religion VS Humanity shits...